Blow tube Communicator, like in the movies.

You know, Captain on the bridge of a fast frigate, calling the engine room, picks up some sort of flexible tube, blows through it, then "Full speed ahead, we're going to ram that sub", etc. Except in my case, "Bring me a Guiness".

Questions:
What are those things called ?
How do they work ?
How can I make one ?
Where do I buy one ?
Etc.,

PS. For those who don't understand, if it's electrical, then it's not what I'm talking about.

Voice Tube Voice Pipe are some of the names.

In the days prior to electronics on riverboats, the mouthpiece at each of the tube would have a stopper or cork that stayed in the end of the tube. That stopper was usually made of wood and had a whistle carved or made into it.
The Captain or Pilot would remove his whistle/stopper and blow into the tube real hard which would make the whistle/stopper sound-off at the other end of the tube. After hearing his whistle scream, the guy at the other end would pull out the stopper/whistle and yell back up the pipe to the Pilot. After the conversation was over the stopper/whistles were put back in the mouthpiece at both ends.

Some of the more fancy and larger riverboats had atleast 3 of the pipes in the pilothouse going to 3 locations: 1) Engine Room/Boiler Room, this was the most used. 2) Forecastle or Foc'sle, this was the bow of the Boiler or Main deck, used by the Captain when making landings. 3) Captains quarters, the Captain did very little piloting of the boat but was often given a heads-up when the Pilot made decisions to land for the night or fog, etc.

Capt Mark

I am glad you asked. Its sometimes called a "hailer". Here's the plans for a do-it-yourselfer. One thing you left out, was a bell divice to signal those below that you are about to give a command and to pay attention.

Parts needed:
Partial roll of duct tape.
Length of old garden hose.
Two (2) galvinized motor oil funnels with flexible ends.
Bicycle thumb bell, or similar.
Cork
12 pack of Guiness.

Alternative parts.
Long roll of string.
Smaller bowling ball.

Directions:
Drink 3 of the Guiness 'cause you have to do some drilling through your boat. Or else, drink 1 beer, and use more duct tape and a longer piece of garden hose. Cut end off of garden hose. Locate comfortable sitting position on flying bridge. Bend forward and raise one of the funnels to a comfortable position in front of your face so that you can yell into it. Mark and screw into place. Drill a hole through the deck of the flying bridge into the helm space below. Insert one end of the garden hose into the hole and push it on down. Insert the end of the oil funnel into the garden hose and use the duct tape to seal the junction and hold the parts together. Put the cork into the funnel to keep the foul weather out when it rains. More accomplished DIYers will drill a hole in the cork and put a piece of string thru it and knot the end. Some fancier DIYers will even go so far as to use glues and screws to hold the funnel and hose together. Now, go below and measure the hose down into the galley through the hatchway, cut and trim hose to appropriate length. Insert second oil funnel into hose and secure with tape. Use a dry wall screw to secure funnelto the cabinetry at head level for the Mrs. A dry wall screw is OK because it is out of the weather down below and you can always screw and unscrew it to find just the right position.

Drink another one or two beers since you are down there and close to the fridge anyway. Careful now, a boat can get pretty rockety. Get back up to the flying bridge, set down and wait for your head to clear. If it is hot, put some sunblock on so you don't get cancer so fast. Remember, you are not as young as you once were. Have another beer because you feel so bad about this. OK,ok, now it is time to get back to work. Mount the bell on the flying bridge rail behind you. Go down below and get a beer, tell your wife you think you are ready to test the system. Go back up, sit down, turn around and give the bicycle bell a couple of good rings. Then yell into the funnel, "Yo, Dudette, cold one for the Captain!"

At this point, further refinements to the system will depend on your mate's response. In about 1 out of 10,000 times, she will bring you the beer. Buy her a fur coat and keep her around. The odds are pretty slim, but you found a winner. More than likely, nothing will happen.

Refinement No.1. Position the bowling ball so that it rolls off the flying bridge deck and lands with a loud bang below. This ought to get her attention and when she comes up, start ringing the bell and 'Hailing" her for a cold one. Be cafeful, many women can over-react at this point and have been known to come up with fire extingisher in hand instead of a cold one. Be ready to dive overboard because there is no place to take cover on a flying bridge.

Refinement No. 2. Pull a string down the same path as the garden hose. Cleaverly attach a bracelet to the end of it and, just as cleaverly, get the wife to try it on. Tie it using a nautical knot and lie about what it is for. Yep, you got it. Get another beer and go back up. Give the string a tug until it stops, then yell into the funnel. "Yo, Sweety, 1 up". Enjoy it if you get it. Yeah, right!

History of Hailers. Hailers went out of vouge when women were allowed on board instead of cabin boys. Listen, Captain, the chances of your wife bringing you ANYTHING you HOLLER for are pretty close to zero. Also please note that hailers belong on wooden boats. If yours is fiberglass, you will have to come up with another solution. That brings several stories to my mind, but I will save them for another time.
Jerry at the point of the spear.

Well I think it's clear to see, our good friend and patriot, Jerry, is suffering from severe effects of boatitis, accentuated by the fact that he is so far from the water, the darn place looks like Iraq.

Actually, I was thinking of two lines of 1/2" acquarium tubing running parallel from bridge to cabin. A whistle would be plumbed onto the bottom end of one line, and the top end of the other line. It would work even if the electricity was off. One whistle for Guiness, two for a shot of Scotch, and so forth!

Paul